Posts Tagged ‘It’s a Dog’s Life’

Today’s been a good, productive day. I slept in a bit (always a nice treat), talked with my husband, played with the dogs, sold some books to Half-Price Books, went to the Farmers’ Market, watched a documentary, baked bread, made dinner, and I’m looking forward to a relaxing evening.

There’s bread in the oven, stir-fry on my plate, and spilled Dr. Pepper on the floor. Wait! That’s not a good thing! 

In all the time she’s lived with us, Molly has begged for many things. Never has she begged for soda pop nor has she gone to extreme means to obtain it.

Scout, on the other hand, is fascinated with soda pop. If I am ever so foolish as to leave it within his reach, he will knock it over in his eagerness to consume the sugary goodness. And yes, you guessed it, when I went to shape the bread loaves and start the stir-fry, I incautiously left a cup of Dr. Pepper on the end table in the living room. I heard an ominous noise coming from there, but my mind was on chopping vegetables, so I just told Scout to stop whatever he was doing. He did.

A few minutes later I thought that I’d better see what he’d been up to. First I just saw a magazine on the floor and thought it was no big deal. Then I saw the puddle of Dr. Pepper.

Okay, so I cleaned it up and there’s not really spilled soda on the floor. Still, there really is bread in the oven, stir-fry on my plate, and two dogs staring longingly at me even though they know good and well I’m not giving them any stir-fry.

All’s right with my world. At least for this few minutes.

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Scout just peed on me!! 

I brought a toy from down the hall and tossed it to Molly, and he gave me that look that asked where his was. And he has an identical toy, and it’s in his crate. So I gestured toward his crate, and he ran away from me because he knows that when I put him in his crate I’m about to leave. I felt bad, and told him I wasn’t going anywhere, and I went to give him a scratch, and he rolled over so I could rub his belly and he peed on me!!!



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Remember when I said that my childhood self totally planned to marry Speed Racer when I grew up?


Well, Friday night the incomparable Izzybella and L-2 went to a movie together. And they got me a poster for the new Speed Racer movie!  Woot! It’s hanging on a wall in my office where I can see it all the time.

Anyone wanna join me Friday night? ‘Cause on account of you know where I’ll be. 😀

Okay, changing subject but still on topic, my dogs love me. I’m not sure, though, how much of this is love and how much is competition between each other. See, pre-Scout, Molly never slept with me. Oh, sure, she’d hop up on the bed with me for a while, get some loves, enjoy some Mommy-and-me time, and then she’d either scoot under the bed or go sleep on the couch. But Scout is firmly convinced that his nighttime place is wherever I happen to be.

And I haven’t bought a new futon mattress yet. I can’t get it until this weekend. This means that I’ve been sleeping on the couch. It’s a comfy couch, but it’s not deep and wide. Basically there’s room for me to lie on the couch, and that’s about it. But Molly claims her spot on the end of the couch, and Scout claims his spot behind the backs of my knees. Honestly, that doesn’t leave me a whole lotta room! I’m just sayin’.

And I’ve tried routing Molly off, so that Scout wouldn’t want up, but that doesn’t work. He genuinely feels he must sleep with me. And she’ll occasionally get down, albeit whilst giving me dirty looks the whole time, but once he’s settled in, she hops back up.


We have a hideous mattress in the master bedroom, and it’s not overly comfortable. Not to me, anyway–Mom likes it when she’s in town. And we no longer have a frame for that bed. We’ve put off getting one until we replaced the whole shebang, and since Joe’s gone so much of the time, the futon and/or sofa have been working just fine. Right now the mattress set is perched atop 4 buckets of wheat (well, food storage has to go somewhere!), only it keeps sliding off one of them. So Izzy’s going to come over this evening and help me maneuver the mattress set off the wheat buckets and just lay it on the floor. It’s a queen size mattress, which is even larger than the futon, so I figure there should be enough room for me, Molly, and Scout. And Joe, when he gets home on Thursday.

So on the one hand, I feel very, very loved by my dogs, even though part of it–at least on Molly’s part–is sheer competitiveness. On the other hand, I feel so cramped at night!

And speaking of the competitiveness between the dogs, Molly’s started a bad habit. Pre-Scout, I’d give her a treat, and she’d take it gently between her teeth. No fear on my part. But he will take stuff right out of her mouth, so she’s started eagerly snapping at the treats, which leaves me in fear for the safety of my limbs. I’ve got to remember to lay them on my palms so they can take them from me without having to snap. And Molly’s started getting even with Scout. Any time he carelessly leaves a treat laying around, she’ll go pick it up and take it off. He gets even with her getting even with him by taking her toys. It’s so funny–we’ll have several toys on the floor, and they both bicker over the same toy. If Scout doesn’t have the giant multi-coloured caterpillar, Molly doesn’t want it. But let him pick it up, and she’ll sit there and glare at him until he goes off for a drink of water or to give me a kiss, and then it’s in her mouth faster than you can blink. 

They’re just like toddlers! I swear! I haven’t worked in the church nursery in many years, but I distinctly remember a 3-year-old boy hitting a 2-year-old girl over the head with a plastic firetruck because she had a toy he wanted.

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Not that my intention was to gloat. I was just celebrating the fact that I had 4 days off. You know? Happy times. Happy times.

So I didn’t accomplish half the things I needed to. And that was okay, I figured. Things go that way, and there were still 3 days left. I got the important stuff done–Scout had his surgery; I visited C’s son Chase; I got the blacklight & batteries; I got a Cap’n Crunch frappuccino (tall strawberries & cream frap with one pump hazelnut and one pump toffee nut); had that fantastic breakfast; took a few pictures of Scout; picked up my prescriptions; went to the bank; got the library books together to return tomorrow; and remembered that I forgot to take a DVD back to the rental place. So that’s a lot, right?

Scout spent much of the afternoon and evening trying to remove his cone and whimpering in frustration. He smelled bad, so I gave him the doggie equivalent of a sponge bath. He ate a little and drank a little water. He tried to poop but was obviously constipated, poor little guy. And I managed to fall asleep on the couch for a little bit despite all that.

And then I woke up and I was hungry and didn’t feel like cooking. And I realized I’d forgotten to get the prescriptions. So I put Scout in his crate and went out to get some supper and my prescriptions. I got back home, and got everything ready to go to bed.

The first surprise was when I started walking down the hall. Poor little dude had apparently, during my nap, tried again to poop with a little more success. Okay, pick it up and flush it down; I can deal with a little poop if I have to.

The second surprise was when I turned on the light in the bedroom. He’d barfed all over my bed. That poor futon mattress has now been barfed on by both dogs, and peed on by both dogs. Joe told me tonight that we’ve got to just toss it out and get a new futon mattress. 😦 

I’m lying on the couch hoping my meds kick in soon so I can get some sleep. I’m watching Meet the Robinsons for the first time, and realize how pathetic I am when Louis is frustrated because no one wants to adopt him, and I’m tearfully telling him that I would. You know, if he weren’t a cartoon character and all. Of course, I also told Chuckie Finster I’d be his mother, provided I could do so without having to marry his father. Insane, huh? What is it with me and cartoon characters anyway? When I was a kid, I wanted to marry Speed Racer when I grew up.

Sorry for that digression. I think my meds are kicking in. So when I told Joe about the poop and the barf, he justly pointed out that kids do that. I agreed, obviously, and said that I wasn’t angry. Just tired and a little frustrated. Hearing Scout whimper all evening wore me out. There was nothing I could do, but just reassure him in words that he doesn’t understand, and give him kisses and pats. And, you know, clean up the messes. He appears to be out like a light–finally–and I’m really hoping that neither dog needs to perform any more bodily functions tonight.

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Curses! Cwned Again!

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Sharin’ the LOL love

Sowwy  Mah gib a dam is busted
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Revenge cat   plots
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joey dog sez  how YOO doin?
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I'm lookin for the man   who shot my paw
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*POOF*  Mah sleeping spell wrkd!
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see more cute dogs and puppies

see more cute dogs and puppies

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Later that same day….

Well, I spent 55 minutes of my lunch hour sleeping in the back seat of my car with the windows rolled down for air. I’ve never done that before–usually I crawl under my desk if I need a nap that desperately–but I didn’t want to hear the sounds coming from the office today. I woke myself with my snoring more than once, and I realized that my sleep apnea is worse than I realized, because I also woke up several times with the feeling that I’d stopped breathing and then started up again. My left earring had come out of my ear and was firmly grasped in my hand, but the earring back was still hanging onto the ear. Very funny. I feel better, though, and think I’ve got enough energy now to get through the afternoon.

L-squared had a good suggestion for me. I’m going to bring Scout’s crate into the bedroom, and put him in the crate tonight. If it’s in the bedroom and he can see me and know I’m not going anywhere, perhaps he’ll not cry all night. And then we’d both get some sleep.

It is so funny to see how animals expand to take up all the room they possibly can. Usually Molly sleeps under the bed. I think the only reason she’s started sleeping on the bed with me is because Scout does, and she is as jealous as she can be. And she’s a good-sized dog, 50 pounds or so, so she can easily take up the bottom third of the bed. And Scout is small, and he curls up into a nice neat little bundle, right against my butt, or right against my back, or right against the backs of my knees. And when he wakes up and wants to change positions, he has to walk across my head or my boobs, drop a kiss or two on my lips (eeeuuuu), and see if he can wake me up to get a bit of a tummy rub before he can go back to sleep. So there was one point where I was lying cross-ways across the bed with my head almost hanging off and my feet up against the wall because Molly was hogging the foot of the bed and Scout was behind my back. It was just so not a fun night.

We seem to be succeeding finally at housebreaking Scout. When I come home from work and let him out of his crate, I grab a handful of dog treats and we all go out into the back yard where I cheerily urge them on to go tinkle. Usually they’ll jump at the treats but I keep telling them to go tinkle and then they can have a treat. Molly is typically the first to go, so she’ll come get a treat. Scout catches on, goes and does his business, and comes to get his treat. What’s funny is when Molly figured out that I’m going to praise and treat her every time she tinkles. So she’ll go tinkle a bit, get a treat, run off and eat it, and then tinkle some more for a second treat. And yes, Scout caught on to that, too, and does it whenever she does. It’s definitely a game of follow-the-leader in our house, and Molly’s the leader.  At any rate, Scout hasn’t peed in the house for almost a week now. Woohoo!

What a sad, boring little life mine must seem, when I can sit here and blog ad nauseum about my dogs and their sleeping and potty arrangements! 😀  Actually, I’m doing all right. Working hard on my writing, working hard on the housework, and getting things accomplished. I imagine that as things continue to settle down, I won’t feel the need to blather on about the dogs. Although they are awfully cute.  I’ll try to remember to upload some photos tonight.

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My Personal Anthem

(with apologies to Bob Dylan)

Well I don’t know how I’ll get through the night,

‘Cause when I got in bed and turned out the light

A big black dog hopped up onto my bed

And a little one curled up by my head.

Dog to the left of me,

Dog to the right, here I am,

With just six inches of bed.


Yes I’ve only got six inches of bed,

And a little dog who jumps on my head.

It’s so hard to get a moment of sleep

And it don’t help to count those fat fluffy sheep.

Dog to the left of me, Dog to the right,

Here I am, with just 6 inches of bed.


Well I started with the whole bed,

Got to flop and stretch and sleep.

And then my dogs come jumpin’,

Kiss me on the face and say,

“Move . . . . Move . . . . “


Tryin’ to get some sleep anyhow,

But I can tell that it won’t happen now.

The little dog kisses me on the lips

And the big dog is shovin’ at my hips.

Dog to the left of me, Dog to the right,

Here I am, with just 6 inches of bed.


Well I started with the whole bed,

Got to flop and stretch and sleep.

And then my dogs come jumpin’,

Kiss me on the face and say,

“Move . . . . Move . . . .”


Well I’ve been tryin’ to get off the caffeine,

But no sleep makes me feel tired and mean

I’m so tired I might fall out of my chair

If that happens leave me lyin’ right there.

Dog to the left of me, Dog to the right,

Here I am, with just 6 inches of bed.

Yes, I’ve got just 6 inches of bed,

Got just 6 inches of bed.


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Don’t get me wrong; I’m madly in love with both dogs, and wouldn’t get rid of them for anything. That doesn’t mean they don’t have their revolting habits, though.

Like this morning. I got up to find a puddle right by my bed. I was most unhappy, as I’ve started getting up earlier than I’m used to and like to so they can get right out and do their business in the back yard.

And then when I was ready to get dressed, I picked up a pair of jeans. We got a free jeans day at work today. Nice, huh? But most of my jeans are in the hamper. This pair technically should be, but I only wore them once, so figured they’d be all right with a little Febreeze. They would have been fine, too, except for the fist-sized hole near the crotch.

I remember Molly doing this when she was a puppy, leaving inconvenient puddles, gnawing on my dirty underwear, and I hated that stage and was truly thankful when she left it. And now I’ve got another one, who likes to leave inconvenient puddles, gnaw on my dirty clothes (I’ve just had to replace most of my underwear, thanks to his incredibly sharp teeth and ability to get anything out of the laundry hamper and/or the trashcan), and give me kisses all over my face right after he’s thoroughly licked his boy-parts clean. Eeeeeuuuuu!!!

We’re working hard on the house-breaking thing.  He spends the day in his crate, so when I get home the first thing we do is grab some treats and make for the back door.  He stands there and looks all cute, and wants to jump on me, while I stand there and idiotically repeat myself, urging him to “go tinkle.” He asks for the treats, and I tell him he can have one as soon as he goes tinkle. Usually Molly will go, and as soon as she gets a treat, he realizes what he needs to do to earn his treat. And our trainer said that if the neighbours don’t think you’re completely nuts, you’re not praising them enough.  I think I’m probably okay there. As soon as he performs, I give him a treat, and praise him, and rub his head or belly and then we all play for a while.

Pictures of the cuteness will get posted either this evening or tomorrow evening, along with some pictures of me in my blue-haired glory. Peace out!

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Gettin’ Better Every Day

Yes, Destructo-dog seems to be starting to understand that he has a home and regular food. I like to give each dog a treat before I leave for work. This morning I gave Molly her treat first, and Scout didn’t try to steal it from her. He waited, not so patiently, for me to give one to him, but at least he knew he was getting one.  And last night, for about 10-15 minutes, both of them were sleeping at the foot of my bed while I was watching television.

I picked up a dog gate after I got off yesterday, and it works beautifully. It’s very easy to use, and Scout cannot jump over it nor find a way through or past it. That is a huge relief. The down-side? He cried what seemed like all night. I’d swear I hadn’t slept a wink except for the fact that I dreamed. I got up at 5 to go to the bathroom, and went ahead and opened the gate. Molly got in bed for a moment so we could snuggle, and then she crawled under the bed. Scout? Well, he’s like the ball in a pinball machine. Boing-boing-boing-boing-boing from one place to another. He finally settled down to sleep about 5 minutes before I had to get up.

But improvement is good, no matter how slow, and I’m glad.

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