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Archive for May, 2011

Doggie Loves

Thanks, Izzy.  You just *had* to forward that loldogz post to me, didn’t you?  You obviously knew I’d finished my day’s work before the day was half over, and you knew I’d have to find some way to keep myself amused.  Well, puh!

funny dog pictures - NOMS SHAL PASS!!!1!

funny dog pictures - Fubzy ting? Wee deaded it.   U wellcoms.

funny dog pictures - Though she loved her husband and the puppies, Shiela often reminisced of wilder, more carefree days  with her obedience school yearbook.

funny dog pictures - HAY GURL!1!  HAY.

funny dog pictures - I thought for sure they'd end up together....

funny dog pictures - Yeah I  King Mutt of Fleagypt.. mwahaha!!

funny dog pictures - Ah, so the button for the zappy pow thing goes there not there...

funny dog pictures - humans are weird that way

funny dog pictures - 'SUP DAWG? HOW YEH DOIN DAWG?!?!

funny dog pictures - U Deside: Teh Goggie Breed ob teh Week!

cute puppy pictures - Cyoot Puppeh ob teh Day: Sumday I Will Be Strong

funny dog pictures - "I am torn between patriotism and the desire for an epic pee."

funny dog pictures - ai iz pwintsess  pwintsesses dont go to vet

OK. I’ll stop now.

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Friday Fill-Ins

And…here we go!

1. This week I thought our house was going to be blown away to OZ (the one with the yellow brick road, not the one in the southern hemisphere).

2. Many happy returns.

3. It’s all about to change.

4. This weekend it would be fun to lay out in the sun.

5. I demand to be heard and taken seriously.

6. I changed to a new path, it’s filled with mysteries galore.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to sleeping and snuggling with my dogs, tomorrow my plans include getting my hair done and having some quality time with Izzy and the Doctor and Sunday, I want to have a quiet day at home!

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Thursday Thunks is taking us back to high school this week.  Let’s just say that I *never* had/have/will have any desire to return to high school. 🙂

  1. Who was your best friend?  Ann N. at Plano–I didn’t really have a best friend at Richland High School.
  2. Did you play any sports? Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha! Excuse me while I pick myself off the floor?  Did I play any sports?  I played water polo in PE, but not intramurally. Only in class. And I pretty much sucked at it. Other than that, the only sport I excelled in was cutting class every chance I got.
  3. What kind of car did you drive? A red Toyota Corolla that I christened Charlie.
  4. It’s Friday night. Where were you? Probably home. But possibly at Liquid Assets with the 2nd most detestable boyfriend I ever had.
  5. Were you a party animal? I was in my own mind, but probably not really.  Looking back, I realize that I was extremely naive.
  6. Were you considered hot? By some people, but probably not really.
  7. Were you in the band, orchestra, or choir? Not in high school. I was temporarily in band in junior high school, but not for long.
  8. Were you a nerd? Yes. But not a math nerd. An English nerd.
  9. Were you ever suspended or expelled? No, but I came damned close. In my senior year, I skipped every chance I got, and forged excuse notes from my mother. Of course I got caught. I’m not that good of a liar.
  10. Can you sing the fight song? Nope. I never went to a football game, never went to a pep rally. I pretty much hated school spirit.

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Tornados

Springtime in North-Central Texas frequently brings storms with hail, and occasional tornados.  We had some bumpy weather in Dallas-Ft. Worth last night.  Tornados all over the place.  I was hunkered down in the hall with pillows, blankets, my best Coach purse (wasn’t going to be separated from it by any dumb tornado!), a book, and my Molly dog.  Scout was playing it cool in the living room, and Joe was in and out.  He kept saying he was going to drive over to the mall and park in their covered parking to protect at least one of our vehicles from the hail, but he was too fascinated by the tornados to actually do it.

One tornado went directly over our house, but, thank heavens, didn’t touch down.  It was crazy.  I felt the pressure on my sinuses increase to an almost unbearable level, and then it let back up.  And it sounded kind of like a freight train.  I had my head under the blankets, and Joe was in the back yard.

I don’t get men. I really don’t.

Anyway, we were very fortunate. It looks like we may have some roof damage, but we do have homeowner’s insurance. And Joe said we lost a lot of branches from trees in the back yard, but the front yard tree looks fine. There was a fair bit of hail, mostly shooter marble sized, but there were a couple of baseball-sized hailstones.  They missed our car windows–yay!

And I’m pleased to say that as of this morning, there was no more bad weather in the forecast.

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Photo credit: Magda Wojtyra

“Truth is the shattered mirror strewn in myriad bits; while each believes his little bit the whole to own.” (Robert Burton)

Photo credit: Fading Existence

“Adversity is like a strong wind. It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are.” (Arthur Golden)

 

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Another Meme

Sorry for the memes, folks.  I’ve got a lot on my mind, and it’s things that I prefer not to blog about here, right now. I’ll be back eventually. 🙂

1. Were you named after anyone?
I chose my first name myself; my original first name was because both grandmothers had wanted a daughter with that name; and my original middle name was a family name on my mother’s side.

2. When was the last time you cried?
I don’t recall. That’s one of the things that my medications sort of prevent from happening most of the time.

3. Do you like your handwriting?
I do, but I don’t anyone else would.

4. What is your favorite lunch meat?
It’s ham, mainly because that’s the only meat that I have had absolutely no trouble in eating since my lap band surgery. It used to be chicken, but, as I’ve discussed here previously, I can no longer eat chicken.

5. Do you have kids?
No.

6. If you were another person would you be friends with you?
I think so, but we would both like our solitude enough that we probably wouldn’t get together too often.

7. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
Sarcasm? What’s that?

8. Do you still have your tonsils?
No, they were removed when I was in 7th grade.

9. Would you bungee jump?
It’s on my bucket list.

10. What is your favorite cereal?
I don’t really eat cereal anymore.

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
No. I untie them before I put them on.

12. Do you think you are strong?
Stronger than you know.

13. What is your favorite ice cream?
Ben & Jerry’s.

14. What is the first thing you notice about people?
Their smiles.

15. Red or pink?
Well, today I’m wearing a red and white striped top, so I’ll go with red.

16. What is the least favorite thing about yourself?
Anxiety and mild agoraphobia.

17. Who do you miss the most?
Alicia, always.

18. Do you want everyone to send (link) this back to you?
I’m not tagging anyone, so I don’t care.

19. What color pants and shoes are you wearing?
Blue jeans, and bronze sandals.

20. What was the last thing you ate?
5 wheat crackers.

21. What are you listening to right now?
People talking around me.

22. If you where a crayon, what color would you be?
Purple. Duh.

23. Favorite smells?
The smell of the dirt and the air just before it rains. Any bath stuff by Lush.

24. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
Melany.

25. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
I found it on the blog of someone I don’t know, but I find him fascinating, so we’ll go with a yes.

26. Favorite sports to watch?
Football (aka soccer).

27. Hair color?
Dark red with greying/dark brown roots because I really need to get it coloured again.

28. Eye color?
Green.

29. Do you wear contacts?
Only if I want to see.

30. Favorite food?
Potato soup.

31. Scary movies or happy endings?
They’re not mutually exclusive.

32. Last movie you watched?
Not a movie, but episode 3 of Season 1 of Wallander. Brilliant series.

33. What color shirt are you wearing?
Red and white striped. Very nautical, with gold buttons.

34. Summer or winter?
Winter.

35. Hugs or kisses?
Hugs. I can feel the stress drain out of me when I’m being hugged.

36. Favorite dessert?
Ice cream.

37. What book are you reading now?
The Throne of Fire.

38. What is on your mouse pad?
My mouse.

39. What did you watch on TV last night?
I wasn’t watching TV last night.

40. Favorite sound?
Silence.

43. Rolling Stones or Beatles?
Beatles, definitely. Although I like the Stones.

41. What is the farthest you have been from home?
I’ve been from Buffalo NY to San Francisco California, and from Miami Beach to Toronto.

42. Do you have a special talent?
I’m a loyal friend.

43. Where were you born?
Lone Star, Texas.

44. What time is it now?
11:22 a.m.

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Another Book Meme

From Kuri, the 106 (why 106? nobody knows) books most often tagged “unread” at LibraryThing. The idea is to mark the ones you’ve read in bold, the ones you’ve started but not finished in italics, and the ones you read for school in bold and underlined. À la Kuri, I put asterisks next to the ones I plan to read.

I’m not tagging anyone, but I’m interested in seeing your responses if you do try it. 

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell
Anna Karenina 
Crime and Punishment
Catch-22
One Hundred Years of Solitude
Wuthering Heights (HATE, HATE, HATE THIS BOOK!! Cathy and Heathcliffe deserved each other.)
The Silmarillion
Life of Pi: a novel
The Name of the Rose (I doubt I’ll be going back to it.)
Don Quixote
Moby Dick
Ulysses
Madame Bovary
The Odyssey*
Pride and Prejudice
Jane Eyre
The Tale of Two Cities  (This was assigned in 8th grade, and my teacher said, and I quote, “You’re going to hate this book but you have to read it anyway, so I don’t want anyone complaining.”  I read it that night and told her the next day that she was crazy. True story.)
The Brothers Karamazov
Guns, Germs, and Steel: the fates of human societies
War and Peace*
Vanity Fair (I’ve mentioned this book before, I’m sure. I will never attempt to read it again. Last time I tried, I hurled it across the room. Now it’s on my nook, and I don’t think my nook would survive being hurled across the room.)
The Time Traveler’s Wife* (I’m only going to read it because of Jehara’s recommendation.)
The Iliad*
Emma
The Blind Assassin
The Kite Runner  (Brilliant book, as is A Thousand Splendid Suns by the same author. In fact, I think I like that one even better.)
Mrs. Dalloway*
Great Expectations (Wouldn’t it be cool to own a bridal supply store called Mrs. Havisham’s Bridal Shoppe?  Would anyone get it?)
American Gods
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Atlas Shrugged  (Not a fan of Ayn Rand. She seems too imbued with a sense of self-importance.)
Reading Lolita in Tehran: a memoir in books*  (Jehara recently reviewed this at Quirky Girls Read, and I do want to read it.)
Memoirs of a Geisha*
Middlesex
Quicksilver
Wicked : the life and times of the wicked witch of the West* (I accidentally put this in storage so I never got around to finishing it. Love the musical, though.)
The Canterbury Tales (Have you read the title of this blog? Chauceriangirl? Yeah. I worship The Canterbury Tales.)
The Historian: a novel (One of the bigger wastes of my time.)
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Love in the Time of Cholera
Brave New World
The Fountainhead
Foucault’s Pendulum
Middlemarch
Frankenstein
The Count of Monte Cristo
Dracula
A Clockwork Orange
Anansi Boys
The Once and Future King
The Grapes of Wrath
The Poisonwood Bible: a novel*
1984
Angels & Demons (Shudder. I don’t plan to read anything else by Dan Brown.)
The Inferno (and Purgatory and Paradise) (Inferno is far superior to Purgatorio and Paradiso).
The Satanic Verses*
Sense and Sensibility
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Mansfield Park
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
To the Lighthouse
Tess of the D’Urbervilles  (Another one I really hated)
Oliver Twist (Consider yourself at home! Consider yourself part of the family. We’ve taken to you, so strong, It’s clear, we’re going to get along! Okay, that’s not really in there, but I love the musical.)
Gulliver’s Travels (I love when I have to read something for school and end up really loving it. That’s what happened with His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman. That’s also what happened with Gulliver’s Travels. Because Gulliver’s Travels isn’t really about a giant man who puts out a fire in the Lilliputian castle by pissing on it.)
Les Misérables
The Corrections
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time (This was one of the books that I felt I should like, but just, didn’t.)
Dune (Loved the book. Hated the movie.)
The Prince*
The Sound and the Fury
Angela’s Ashes: a memoir
The God of Small Things
A People’s History of the United States: 1492-present
Cryptonomicon
Neverwhere
A Confederacy of Dunces (I know this is supposed to be brilliant, but I just couldn’t get into it.)
A Short History of Nearly Everything*
Dubliners
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
Beloved
Slaughterhouse-five
The Scarlet Letter
Eats, Shoots & Leaves
The Mists of Avalon
Oryx and Crake: a novel
Collapse: how societies choose to fail or succeed
Cloud Atlas
The Confusion
Lolita
Persuasion
Northanger Abbey
The Catcher in the Rye
On the Road*
The Hunchback of Notre Dame (I “read” this by listening to it on CD.  I highly recommend audio books for those that you’re having trouble getting into–you’re sort of a captive audience, and before you know it you’re past the parts that you were never past before. Hmmm. Wonder if I should find Vanity Fair on CD.  Nah.)
Freakonomics: a rogue economist explores the hidden side of everything
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: an inquiry into values (I thought this was so profound when I was 18.)
The Aeneid*
Watership Down (Another one I just couldn’t really get into. I don’t feel guilty about it, though.)
Gravity’s Rainbow
The Hobbit
In Cold Blood: a true account of a multiple murder and its consequences
White Teeth
Treasure Island
David Copperfield
The Three Musketeers

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  • I can’t eat bacon.
  • I can’t, as discussed last night, eat chicken.
  • I can’t eat bread unless it’s well toasted.
  • If anything gets stuck, I can’t try to help wash it down.

Whoever said getting weight loss surgery was taking the easy way out?  I’d like that person to sit with me for some good discussions. I’d even be willing to try to eat a little chicken so that person could see what happens when I commit a dietary indiscretion.

I do not for an instant regret having this surgery done.  But don’t anyone try to tell me I took the easy way out.

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Owwwwwwwwwwwwww

When I went in for the fill on Monday, the PA asked how I was doing. I told him fine, and that the only things I consistently have trouble with are chicken and bread.  If the chicken is very tender, I can usually get it down okay. Bread, well, let’s just not go there.

So tonight I had 3 tiny bites of tender chicken, a couple of small bites of mashed potatoes, and a small bite of broccoli.  That adds up to 5 bites.

I vomited 5 times.

😦

I will NOT be eating chicken anymore. Period.

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Sheer Poetry

A little while ago I made a post on sleep paralysis.  To refresh your memory, here is a little bit of it:

The only reason I know about sleep paralysis is because I suffer from it.  My understanding is that you wake up before a REM cycle is completed.  It takes anywhere from a few seconds to a few minutes before you’re able to speak or move.  It’s accompanied by extremely vivid hallucinations (the remnants of dreams, perhaps).  When I have had episodes of sleep paralysis, I always felt like I was being tortured by some evil spirit, a demon from hell or Satan himself, and if I could just move my finger or call for help, it would go away.  I felt panicky while I tried, unsuccessfully, to move a finger or even whisper.  Eventually I would be able to feebly call for help, and then the paralysis broke and I could move.  It also seemed that if I went back to sleep too quickly after an episode of sleep paralysis, I would have another episode the same night. 

 

Someone in a blog I read shared some abstract poetry that she got by selecting a previous post, running it several times through Google translator, to see what she came up with.  It sounded amusing, so here’s mine.  I went first to Arabic, then Haitian Creole, then Polish, to Yiddish, to Welsh, and back to English:

because I only know about sleep paralysis,

because I suffer from it.

I understand that you will wake up before the end of the frame cycle. It takes a few seconds to several minutes before being able to speak and move.

With bright and Hallucinations (in dreams remnants, perhaps).

When I sleep Chapters paralysis here and always felt he was

tortured

by some evil spirit,

demon from hell or the devil himself,

and if we can just move your finger or a cry for help, she left.

I felt panic when she tried, unsuccessfully, to move the fingers, or even whisper.

Finally, I twice to get help and break the Deadlock, and turn possible.

OK, this is fun.  Now I’m going to try it with something else.  Here’s the original text:

I’ve got a tender heart. And people with tender hearts tend to get them drop-kicked, stomped, squished, stabbed, mutilated in every way conceivable. I’m older now, wiser, stronger. If you fuck with me, I’ll probably at least verbally give you as good as you dished out. But the heart still bleeds, and my eyes still weep when I’m alone again.

Here is the French translation (just for you, Jehara) (translated from English to Swahili to French):

J’ai un coeur tendre. Et les gens ont tendance à cœur de les faire arrêter coups de pied, piétiné, écrasé, brûlé, mutilé par tous les moyens de penser. Je suis plus vieux maintenant, la sagesse et la force. Comme baiser avec moi, je vais probablement au moins aussi bonne que ce que vous prodiguées. Mais le cœur saigne encore, et mes yeux pleure encore quand je suis seul à nouveau.

And here is the final version. It went from English to Swahili to French to Latin to Dutch to Italian, and then back to English:

I have a soft heart.

And people understood them

at the end of the heart,

and the tread,

broken,

burned

and in the trunk, for any reason.

Now I have the old man, with wisdom and virtue.

How the fuck

me,

I was thrown down as a probable.

But the heart bleeds and my eyes

I’ll cry me a second time.

Wow! This is fun!! Why don’t you try it, and send me a link and I’ll go read your random poetry!

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