I’m having a rocky time right now.
Back pain that is so bad I can hardly walk from my car to my desk, from my desk to my car, etc. The doctors just throw meds at it–steroid shot, muscle relaxers–and none of it helps. I’ve been getting massages. Not helping. I tried contacting a chiropractor near work today and didn’t get a call back. Gonna try another one tomorrow.
House crap. The bank won’t release the next draw until they get a copy of the scope from the adjuster for the insurance company (I thought they already had it). They also won’t release the next draw until Joe and I pay our portion, as the contract is for more than what the adjuster said. The insurance adjuster’s not returning my phone calls asking for a copy of the scope, because our copy is either in our current garage, our storage unit, or Clover’s garage, and I have no idea where. And I can’t exactly go through piles of boxes, because of the back pain (see above). I met our contractor after work and gave him a check for $5K. I don’t know how we’re going to be able to afford the replacement furniture we need, because between the public adjuster who soaked us for $13K in exchange for doing jack, the company who did the pack-out and inventory and didn’t even both delivering all of our furniture (e.g., they gave us our headboard and footboard, but not the side rails) for $21K, and then the lovely cleaners who charged something like $6K for cleaning not even a third of our clothing, we’ve given away almost all of the money the insurance company gave us for our contents. Anyway, our contractor told me today that they’ll be able to get the light fixtures and sinks and bathroom fixtures and door handles and etc. with the check I gave him today, and the countertops have come in and are beautiful. But we had to sign another 4-month lease with the apartments because we don’t have any idea when our house will be ready, and we had to move to another apartment because we’d overoptimistically given our 60 days’ written notice and we couldn’t stay in our old apartment because they’d already rented it, which means we had to pay new application fees and new deposits. And Emmylou’s already destroyed the carpet, and we haven’t even been here a week. We moved in Thursday. She behaved herself Friday (Joe’s out of town until tomorrow), and she was good this weekend while I was out. But when I got home from work today, I found poop on the carpet (not on any of the 4–count ‘em, 4–pads I left out for the purpose), the mail that was in a wire basket to keep everything together had been shredded all over the floor, and the carpeting and carpet padding in front of our bedroom door has been torn to bits. I’d left the bedroom door closed, you see, because I’m currently sleeping on an air mattress and don’t want her to ruin that. Anyway, we’re out the deposit already, natch.
I’ve not gotten any of the promotions I’ve applied for. The last hiring manager, when he called to break the news, suggested that I seek lateral transfers, so I can learn more about the business by doing it instead of by testing it in compliance. I thought that was a good idea, so I’ve applied for 2 lateral transfers. Haven’t been called for interviews yet, so I don’t know what’s happening there. Jehara has kindly been sending me job postings where she works, and they look interesting, but I don’t have the experience they’re searching for. I know that I can sell myself with confidence, but right now between the physical pain and the frustration over the house and everything else, my confidence isn’t there. I got a journal yesterday to start recording affirmations, and trying to get myself into a place of power as opposed to a place of fear and pain. It’ll take a while, but I know I can get there.
And then there’s this moron:
If you don’t like ugly language, please skip the rest of this post. Todd Akin is a dumbass motherfucker. He has it on the best scientific authority that pregnancies are seldom a result of legitimate rape.
I’ll pause, and let that sink in.
When I was a kid, we had a neighbour. I don’t remember her name. I only remember that she insisted we kids call her by her first name, but I grew up in Georgia in the 60′s, and kids didn’t call adults by their first names or we’d get a whupping by our parents. So I compromised. I called her Miz Whatever when Mom was around, and by her first name when she wasn’t. Anyway, I remember this woman being pregnant, and her husband was not happy about it. I didn’t know the family dynamics or anything. I just thought it was cool that she was going to have a baby. My mom told me later that this woman had been raped, and the pregnancy was the result of a rape. If I recall correctly, she didn’t report it to anyone because she was afraid, and her husband had had a vasectomy so he knew he wasn’t the father, and it was a lot of unpleasantness for all concerned. But according to Akin, since she got pregnant, it apparently wasn’t a legitimate rape. This woman would disagree.
I was raped once. It was a date rape type thing; I was drunk, and in no condition to give my consent. It hurt. It was embarrassing. I felt totally shamed and degraded. I didn’t realise it was rape at the time. I’m not sure that the concept of date rape existed then, the way it does now, or perhaps I’d have realised it sooner. I didn’t get pregnant. Does that mean that my rape was legitimate?
It doesn’t fucking matter. Rape is rape is rape is rape is rape. If a woman cannot and does not give consent, it’s rape. If she is drunk or high or otherwise impaired, and if she would not normally give her consent, even if she doesn’t fight against it, it’s still rape. Even a married man or woman can rape his or her spouse. Rape happens in marriages as well as out of marriages. Prostitutes–there’s an old joke about what charge to file against a person who raped a prostitute–rape, or theft of services. That’s not funny. Yes, it’s possible to rape a prostitute. If you’re reading my blog, you already know how I feel about things, and you’re probably well educated. But if you want to know more, you need to check out STFU Rape Culture. They say it a lot more eloquently and decisively than I feel like I can right now.
While I’m not a Republican anymore, and have turned into quite the liberal, I am not naive enough to think that Akin’s idiocy is reflective of the Republican party in general. While a few have spoken out in his defense, overall I get the impression that the GOP is distancing themselves from him, as they rightfully should.
But Science Committee? You need to get rid of this moron.