What I Need

(Yes. Still bored, but managing to amuse myself.)

Faith Needs. You know the drill. Go to Google, type your name and the word needs; enclose them in quotation marks and hit the button. Find thirteen responses that are reasonable coherent and post them in your blog. I ended up having to go with my detested old nickname of Ginny because if you type in “Faith needs” you come up with all kinds of religious crap. Not that I think religion is crap. I don’t. And I actually got some funny search results, like “faith needs to be shaken, not stirred.” But that wasn’t really what this was for. So here are my results when I did the Ginny needs. (Do you know that when I refer to myself as Ginny, a deep shudder goes down my spine?  Urgh!)  And I think these responses are even funnier than the ones I got for what Faith needs. 

DISCLAIMER TO THE SPAMMERS: NO! I DO NOT REALLY NEED #2, #5, #8, OR #11. THE OTHERS MAY BE DEBATABLE.

1. “Ginny needs to snap into reality. Dutchgirl. Apr 12 2005, 12:18 AM. obs: Syche needs to leave Ginny alone. obs: Although Shunter has been here for a while, …”
2. “Ginny needs to die (because she deserves no love) so Harry and Draco can have little sex romps whenever they please! ^_^ …”
3. “Ginny needs to go to Paris, not just to help herself, but because I think this job really is going to be good for her. The one I feel most sorry for though, …”
4. “Ginny needs a rest.. But Ginny must pay rent.. Arrrggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… I have a plethora, a clutch, a flock, a shoal, a herd of ideas for brain burpings, …”
5. “Ginny needs a company like A-1 Pooper Scoopin’. You might say it’s a crap job. Diane Blanchard is a professional pooper-scooper. She makes a living picking …”
6. “And Ginny needs some chocolate. Now I KNOW that the dementors are somehow tied to Voldemort. I wouldn’t be surprised if he CREATED them. …”
7. “Ginny needs a home where she will receive regular walks and attention. In typical Collie cross fashion, she loves playing ball. …”
8. “Ginny needs a man. Not just any man, but a man with a particular taste for kinky sex. She needs a trustworthy dominant male to fulfil her submissive …”
9. “Ginny needs answers, and the only way she can get them is to cooperate with Brett Taylor, who grew up in the … Police Business (Harlequin Intrigue Series) …”
10. “Ginny needs to learn to deal with Sharon because Sharon is not doing … Ginny needs to know for herself that she is thin and doesn’t have big feet. …”
11. “But Ginny needs another dimension: attending Pentecostal revival meetings where she is moved to speak in tongues is the only way she can satisfy her craving …”
12. Ginny needs to get a mailer out that addresses the scurrious lies that the …… But Ginny needs all kinds of support. The GOP is flooding this race with …
13. Ginny needs a special home or office environment where she does not have access to soft material furniture such as a bed or couch. Ginny was traumatized as …

The Harry Potter IQ Test

Talk about a dang hard test! I fancy myself pretty much an expert in the Harry Potterverse, and yet I scored a measly 87 out of a possible 250 points!?! 

I didn’t do so well on the Diagon Alley quiz, either, obviously.

I did better on the Professors quiz. Finally! I was starting to feel a titch frustrated!

Uh, yeah. I’m bored. Finally got caught up at work. Why? What makes you think that?

Something About Me Challenge

I don’t sign up for a whole lot of challenges; I figure my life is challenging enough as it is.  But I like the idea of this one. Pick 5 books that represent myself, and post them. Then I’ll pick 5 books total from the lists posted by the other participants and read them.  So here are my 5. I’ll post them on the official blog, but figured I’d go ahead and post them here as well, just in case anyone’s interested. 

1. Grimm’s Grimmest, by Brothers Grimm, Wilhelm Carl Grimm, Jacob Ludwig Carl Grimm, Gracy Arah Dockray (Illustrator) Maria M. Tatar (Introduction).  There’s a part of me that still somehow expects life to be like a fairy tale.  Even though there’s all the sucky unfairness of everything, somehow there’s got to be a happy ending. The good people get rewarded, the bad guys get their just desserts, and everyone lives happily ever after. Grimm’s Grimmest contains some of the darkest of Grimms’ fairy tales, and is a satisfying read.
2. Adopted Jane, Helen Fern Daringer, Kate Seredy (Illustrator). This is a book that I first read as a child. I don’t remember if I found it at the library or if I had my own copy; if I did have my own copy, it didn’t survive. Only my fondest memories did. I loved how this girl was so plucky, so hungry for love, and so worthy of love that two different families wanted to adopt her. I loved how she made the right choice. I like the book so much that when I found it in the Orange County Library when I was in my mid-20s, I wanted to steal it. But I was honourable and just checked it out, read it for nostalgia’s sake, and returned it. I was rewarded by finding it in a Goodwill for 20 cents a year later.
3. The Canterbury Tales, Geoffrey Chaucer, Nevill Coghill (Translator).  I’m passionate about Geoffrey Chaucer and everything I’ve been able to lay my hands on by him. I particularly love The Canterbury Tales. They range from sublimely pure to delightfully bawdy to revoltingly filthy.  If you haven’t read them, you’re depriving yourself a delectable treat.
4. Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury. I have spoken out for years about book banning. I am vehemently opposed  to censorship. The situation described in this book is like my worst nightmare. I’ve given copies of this book away as door prizes at my banned book parties.  If I had to be a portion of a book, I could easily be the Miller’s Tale from The Canterbury Tales. J
5. Uglies, Scott Westerfeld. I love dystopian fantasies, and this is an excellent representation of its kind. I cannot deny that if someone were to give me the opportunity to become earth-shakingly beautiful, I’d want to take it. And if it were to come at the expense of my brains, would the offer still be so tempting? Knowing that fact, it would not. But the people in this world don’t know it.